I've been wanting to round up my favorite parenting resources for quite some time now. But of course, mama-ing got in the way. Now that Bowie is 16 months old (!!!), I figure now is as good of time as any to jot down the things, after much trial and error, that got me through that first crazy year. So here it is - the ultimate new mama survival guide.
- Parasol Diapers: We've finally settled on a good disposable eco-friendly diaper. First we tried Honest Company, but they were rough, didn't fit well and leaked in the middle of the night. Bamboo Nature diapers were much softer and worked well during the day, but we had to use a non-green overnight diaper which defeated the whole purpose. We even messed around with gDiapers and their flushable inserts, but they gave Bo the worst diaper rash he's ever had. Then Parasol came onto the scene and it was a match made in heaven. They are pillow soft, fit perfectly with a high back for blow-outs, and have cute (although limited) designs. We even wear them overnight! They're on the pricier side, but buying on an auto-ship subscription basis helps a lot. Get $20 off if you use this link.
- Library Storytime: I remember how difficult it was to get out of the house with a newborn. During those dark postnatal depression months, Hal used to make me promise him we'd leave home and do something - anything. Library storytimes saved the day. They got us going and kept us motivated. Bowie loved the books, the music, the toys and the other babies. I loved the escape and the new mama friends I made. Best of all, it was free! Seattle has multiple neighborhood storytimes to choose from, so we'd attend a different one 2-3 times a week, filling our schedule and keeping us busy. Not all public libraries allow you to take home board books without checking them out, but ours does and it's wonderful being able to refresh your stash of books without a looming due date deadline. (That's how I discovered the adorable Babylit Books shown above - a series of board books based on classic fiction).
- ChooMee Food Pouch Toppers: I posted about these on Instagram, but these little colorful caps fit on top of any food pouch, including reusable ones filled with homemade purees, making it easier for babes to control the flow of their food. There is literally no mess to clean up afterward! Bowie also uses them as a teether, chewing on the tip when done eating. We only use food pouches for travel these days, but we still rely on these toppers and I always have a stash of them handy in my diaper bag. A truly genius product!
- One Bad Mother Podcast: A dear friend of mine introduced me to this podcast while pregnant. I listened a few times, but really couldn't get into it. Until I had a baby. Then it saved my life! I'm being dramatic, yes. But I don't know how I could have gotten through that first year, particularly the first 6 months, without Biz Ellis and Theresa Thorn, the two ladies who run the podcast, who now feel like my best friends. They hold honest, raw and comical discussions, stories and interviews about the challenges of motherhood. Over the years, they've created an amazingly supportive community of mamas, empowering us to judge less and laugh more. Their motto is - you are doing a good job, something every new parent needs to hear as often as possible. I listened to them daily during my walks with Bowie. Start from the very beginning and work your way up to now!
- Nutribaby Babymov Baby Food Maker: Not everyone wants (or has the time) to make their own baby food, but I got really excited about pureeing up healthy homemade fruits and veggies for my little guy. There are a ton of baby food makers on the market, but I chose this one for a few reasons. One, we didn't have a food processor or a good steamer, so this product solved that problem. Two, there are separate steam compartments so you can cook multiple ingredients at the same time. Three, it comes with a handy chart that tells you exactly how many minutes to steam each particular fruit or veggie, and an app with inventive puree recipes. Four, it also sterilizes and warms bottles and reheats frozen foods so you can avoid the microwave. Now that Bowie is done with purees, I can still use it for soups!
- Water Wipes: Best wipes around, hands down. Why? They are the purest. 99.9 percent water and a drop of grapefruit seed extract, a natural skin conditioner. Since they're void of chemicals, we use these for everything. Diaper changes, wiping hands and face at mealtimes, wiping runny noses. You can buy them in bulk on Amazon.
- Coconut Oil / Calendula: At 6 months, Bowie started getting eczema on his lower back. (FYI - the Honest Company's baby body wash was a huge trigger). So we started daily massages with coconut oil and calendula salve - doctor's orders! Must be nice, right? After a few weeks, the eczema cleared up and hasn't returned since. We still give him daily massages with just coconut oil, which I credit to his super soft skin. It also clears up occasional diaper rash in conjunction with calendula diaper cream.
- Lillebaby Complete Airflow Carrier / Baby K'tan: There are so many baby carriers out there to choose from, and honestly, these two were the only two I tried. But I did a ton of research and talked to a lot of moms about their preferences. I knew I didn't have the patience for an all-wrap style infant carrier, so Baby K'tan was the perfect compromise for the newborn days. It had a relatively easy learning curve and it kept Bowie happily snug as a bug up against my chest during walks. Although I joke that getting him out of the K'tan was like giving birth again! When he got too big for it, we switched to a structured carrier so Hal could wear him as well. I wanted one that could hold Bo in all directions - facing in, facing out, on my hip and on my back. It was between the Lillebaby and the Ergo 360. Lillebaby won in the end because I heard the Ergo got super hot, whereas the Lillebaby Airflow model is made with a soft breathable mesh fabric. In the beginning, I almost returned it because I couldn't figure out how to adjust the straps and belt for the perfect fit. But after a few weeks of trial and error, I got the hang. It's now crazy comfortable and we still use it to this day.
- Baby Sleep Site Personalized Sleep Plans / Swaddle UP: I shudder, thinking back to those first few weeks of sleep training. We used a gentle method, so it took way longer than it should have, but we couldn't have done it without some guidance. I learned about The Sleep Site from a friend, who used it for her kiddo. The results were positive, so I got a basic personalized sleep plan for Bowie. You enter some information about your babe and they email you a long (and I mean long) written out plan. If you pay more, you can ask specific questions, which would have been nice, but we were on a tight budget. We mostly adhered to the plan, but if you go this route, I would suggest you also follow your intuition and your baby's cues. They said we shouldn't nurse our baby to sleep, but sometimes this was the only way Bowie would relax enough to drift off on his own. Advice is always good, but at the end of the day, only you know your baby and what works for him/her. As for swaddles, we tried many - Aden + Anais, velcro SwaddleMe, and the Miracle Blanket. He would bust out of them all! The only one that kept him cozy and contained was the Love To Dream Swaddle UP, which allowed his arms to be up in a natural sleeping position instead of pinned to his body.
- Reversible Sun Bonnet: I love babies in bonnets. Especially boys. We got so many compliments on Bowie's cotton tan and navy blue bonnet, I just had to share where I found it. I'm all about reversible baby clothing - two hats for the price of one! He wore it all spring and summer to protect his little bald head from the sun. And we got the all-white one to wear at a wedding. Because of the chin ties, it was the only hat he didn't yank off his head - perfect for the carrier. You can see him wearing it here, here and here.
- Clothing from Facebook's Buy Nothing / Goodwill: I would say that 95% of Bowie's clothes are pre-owned, from two main sources. One, Facebook's Buy Nothing group. Do you have one in your city? I didn't even know about it until I had a baby. It's an amazing online community composed of just the people in your neighborhood. When a person is ready to give something away, they list it as a gift on Facebook. If you're interested in the item, you add a comment. The owner does a drawing and selects a winner from those who commented. I've gotten so many amazing things this way. However, not all communities are created equal. I've heard stories of other neighborhoods that only post junk. I feel very fortunate that ours is a good one with a ton of parents giving away clothing their children have outgrown. The second source I use is Goodwill. I realize all cities are different, but our particular Goodwill is a goldmine! I'm constantly finding adorable items from Zara, H&M, Gap, TEA, Hanna Andersson and independent designers. Some cute vintage pieces as well. It helps to live in a metropolitan area, I suppose.
- SnoofyBee Changing Pad: Around the time Bowie had eczema, as soon as his diaper was off, he would reach down and scratch the living daylights out of his skin, drawing blood and making the eczema worse. So I was desperate to find something that kept his arms away. Lo and behold, I discovered the SnoofyBee changing pad, also jokingly known as the cone of shame! It has wings that velcro together at his belly, keeping his hands above the waist. You can attach a toy to the top, so babes can play with something while you're wiping their bum. It really worked and even though his eczema went away, we continued to use it for a good 6 months so he wouldn't try to grab his poo!
- Parenting Books / French Kids Eat Everything: I read more parenting books while pregnant than I did after having a baby, because who has the time to read as a new mom? But I did get a chance to read a couple books that I would highly recommend. French Kids Eat Everything is one of them, which gives a personal account of how an American family moved to France and transformed their young children's eating habits from picky to adventurous. Now that Bowie has started to voice his opinions on food, i.e. hurl perfectly good meals across the room, I was determined to figure out how to get him to eat everything I did. I learned some very good pointers and I'm already noticing a difference in his tastes. Another book that helped, especially now that Bowie has started throwing tantrums, is Raising Your Spirited Child - a guide for parents whose child is more intense, sensitive, perceptive, persistent and energetic. My parents laugh at me, because they think that description incorporates all children. I disagree. But even if that were the case, it doesn't hurt to learn some proven strategies for handling tough times with your toddler. It also provides parents with much needed emotional support.
- Prenatal Groups: Hal and I were extremely fortunate to join an incredible prenatal group associated with our hospital's midwifery team. During pregnancy, we'd meet up once a week up until our births. During those sessions, couples would have their prenatal check-ups with a midwife while the rest of the group partook in a childbirth class, sharing stories and asking questions. Often after class, we'd walk to a nearby restaurant and have dinner. It was such a bonding experience, as we were all first-time parents, all due the same month. Strangely enough, we all gave birth early, so the final few classes we got to bring along our newborns to meet the rest of the group and share our birth stories! We've all remained friends to this day, and have regular baby playdates. I realize not all hospitals offer this program, but maybe there's something similar in your area? There are also PEPS groups you can join post-birth, which I believe is the next best thing.
- Fenugreek / Lactation Cookies: Bowie and I had some major breastfeeding challenges in the beginning. I could dedicate a whole post to this. But in a nutshell, since Bowie was born prematurely, my milk took it's sweet time to arrive. When it did arrive, like many first-time mothers, I was stressed about my supply. Constant pumping helped. But my doctor also recommended Fenugreek capsules and I noticed a big difference in volume. My sis-in-law also brought over some incredibly tasty lactation cookies using brewer's yeast (the magic) and fennel seeds, which seemed to help as well. If not with milk production, it definitely helped my mood! Email me if you want the recipe.
- Tinybeans App: One of my best friends, who had her son 6 months before mine, introduced me to the TinyBeans app. She would upload photos and video of her little guy and I would receive them via email every morning. I loved it so much, I started using it myself, enabling me to share special moments of Bowie's life with only close friends and family. This was perfect for me, as I really didn't care to overshare photos of my child on social media. It's also a great way to get images off your phone and assembled into an organized fashion with a calendar view. They've partnered with book printers, so you can easily make a photo book from the pictures you've already uploaded to the app - which is on my to-do list!
- Handmade Rompers: The little bear face romper Bowie wore for his first birthday was included in the small percentage of clothing I've purchased at retail price - for a good reason. These soft and stretchy printed rompers are handmade by Nastya of Anchore Deep on Etsy. They're incredibly comfortable because there's no snaps at the crotch for diaper changes. The neck stretches and you simply pull it on and off over the hips. Bowie will mostly likely be able to wear his for an entire year, because the leg cuffs fold up and down. It's the perfect layering piece - under sweaters and boots in the fall and winter, and by itself with cuffs rolled up in the spring and summer. There's just something so cute about a kid in a romper.
- DIY Stain Remover: When Bowie was born, I switched to non-toxic, all-natural laundry detergents for his sensitive skin. But unfortunately, they just didn't cut it when it came to poo stains! So Hal did some research and made a DIY concoction that really did the trick - equal parts dish soap (we use Mrs. Meyer's), baking soda and hydrogen peroxide. For really bad explosions, it helps to coat the stains with this solution, brush it into the fabric with an old toothbrush, and let it soak in water for awhile before starting the washing machine. So easy!
- Leather Moccasins: They say leather moccasins are the best shoe for new walkers, because they can actually feel the ground beneath them, helping them balance. When Bowie started taking his first steps, I wanted a pair of Freshly Picked mocs. But $60 for a tiny pair of shoes they'll outgrow in a few months seemed rather absurd to me. I do love them and they're very well-made (we later got a pre-owned pair gifted to us via Buy Nothing). But I discovered Melanie of Starry Knight Design on Etsy who makes leather moccasins for less than half the price, with greater style variety, and the option of a waterproof rubber sole - a must in the soggy Northwest. They are very high quality and I've been recommending her shop to all my mama friends!
- One Duo Diaper Backpack: We are big fans of diaper backpacks around here. We wanted one that was minimalist and unisex so Hal would feel comfortable carrying it around. And one that was stylish enough so that I didn't have to carry a separate purse for my own belongings. One Duo bags fit the bill and we've been enjoying ours ever since Bowie was born. Since then, they've made some really cool upgrades that I wish our bag had. Now it has a strap that turns it into a messenger bag, the top zipper has been redesigned for better accessibility, and it also comes with two clips to hang on your stroller. I might just have to trade ours in for the newer model!
- Flower Essences: Have you heard of flower essences / remedies? In a nutshell, they're water-based solutions which contain the essential energies of flowers. Much like Reiki, they're an alternative method of healing used to overcome negative emotions and relieve blockages in the flow of human energy. I was gifted a starter set during my pregnancy and loved what they did for my mood and overall well-being. I continued to use them after giving birth and I truly believe they helped me get out of my postnatal funk. They are fascinating and I plan to write a separate, more detailed post on them soon. Stay tuned!
I hope this list helps any new or expecting mamas out there. Feel free to share this post with anyone you know who might find it useful!
